Be our social media intern.

This is his "excited" face.

Meet Matt The Intern.

Look at how excited Matt The Intern is to be one of the very first people holding the brand-new Wainy Days DVD.

If you were our intern you would be as lucky as he is, too. In FACT, today IS your lucky day because we need social media and graphics interns.

Here's the deal:

• *We are located in New York City, so you must be, too. Or you must be willing at least to commute into New York City on a regular basis.
• *You can receive college credit! If this is of interest to you we can do this... however...
• *Being a student is not a prerequisite. Just know that.

Here are the skills we're looking for:

• *You should be familiar with our content. Some of it. All of it. Take your pick. But you should know something about us.
• *You should have strong writing skills. Please send us links to your Twitter and Tumblr and blog. But not your Pinterest. We don't care about that...YET.
• *You should have basic Photoshop and HTML skills. Have you ever created an image for a meme? Have you posted said image to your blog without the benefit of a blog editor? Do you sometimes wish you could just hold up an animated gif in real-life situations? Fantastic. You're who we want.
• *Basic Final Cut Pro or other video editing skills are wonderful and we could definitely figure out how to use your skills effectively and creatively, but they are not necessary.

Here's what you'd be doing:

• *Hanging out on Tumblr all day.
• *Creating gifs of our content.
• *Helping us think of hashtags.
• *Photoshopping Mary Lynn Rajskub's head onto Jeremy Lin's body just because we think saying "Mary Lynn-sanity" is funny.
• *Helping to optimize all of our social media outlets aesthetically and strategically.
• *Not all of it is fun. Sometimes there is data entry. Sometimes there is heavy lifting. Sometimes there is a coffee run that needs running.

BUT you would definitely get a Wainy Days DVD. Well, probably.

Please send all inquiries to Maria [at] MyDamnChannel [dot] com.

Thanks! And may the odds be ever in your favor! (But not in a BAD Hunger Games sort of way!)

(PS: We have several videos starring Elizabeth Banks!)

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Mark Malkoff's "Free Cab Rides"

Taxi Driver. Taxi. Cash Cab. That movie With Jimmy Fallon, Queen Latifah and Gisele Bundchen that no one will ever admit to seeing.

There's something glamorous and romantic about taxis, right? Who doesn't wish they could jump into one and say "Follow that car!" Or "Step on it!" Or "Don't you dare try to take me down the FDR during rush hour!"

A few weeks ago Mark Malkoff tried to make some taxi riders' dreams come true, so long as their taxi-riding dream wasn't more complicated than getting from one place to another:

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Highlights include when Mark and his driver "Tony Danza" the cab:

And Mark's costume changes:

Make sure you follow Mark on Twitter and Facebook so that the next time he's looking for someone to be in a video, it might be you. You might even get a free meal out of it, so long as you don't mind sitting in your food:

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How To Get a Free Cab Ride with Mark Malkoff

So you want to be in a video with an Internet Celebrity, huh?

Here's your chance:

1. Watch the video above.
2. Be in New York City (mostly around Manhattan) on Tuesday, September 13th.
3. Need a place to go.
4. Tell Mark Malkoff by Tweeting him at @mmalkoff where you are and where you would like to go.
5. Maybe you a get a Free Cab Ride!
6. Maybe you don't.
7. Try again. Keep tweeting @mmalkoff and try to get that free ride!
8. Follow Mark on foursquare to see if he's nearby! (Here's a hint: Your chances of getting picked up are better if he's already in your area!)
9. Follow My Damn Channel on foursquare since we will be checking in with Mark at some point during the day and handing out some My Damn Chanel swag to people who also check in at this location!
10. Wait patiently for the video to premiere here on September 28th and see if your ride made the cut!

If you don't get a free cab ride, hopefully you know how to buy a Metrocard...or may we suggest you invest in a Big Wheel?

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How To Be An Intern

(Intern Josh, wondering forlornly how he ended up here)

EDITOR'S NOTE: It's Josh's last day as an intern for My Damn Channel! I asked him to write up a post telling you what it was like for him this summer!


Coming into My Damn Channel as an intern I thought all I was gonna learn was how to file papers and fill out reports. Boy was I wrong! Friday will be my last day and I still haven't correctly filled out a single report. My boss is always saying that it drives him crazy how long it's taking me to get the hang of the office duties, but I can tell he's just joking. How I treasure that agonized look he gets trying so hard to hold back laughter.

What I learned though was way more valuable than any college education. I would say it was worth about $230,000, a couple hundred more than four years' tuition at Wesleyan. What I learned was the value of making the effort to gain the respect of your peers.

Before I ever set foot into that office, I had my work cut out for me. My future co-workers had already started gossiping that I only got the internship because of my family connections. After failing for three years to strike any gold, my great-great-grandfather started My Damn Channel during the California Gold Rush as a burlesque show designed to entertain entrepreneurs who had given up on trying to find gold and started companies catered to the needs of the gold miners. Grandpa Schmulie Meisel. I can't believe that was such a popular name back then — Grandpa.

My first day at work the guy sharing my cubicle got mad at me for unplugging his computer. "What do you need a blender for?!" he irrationally snarled. "How else are you gonna make computer smoothies silly? By hand?!" I chucked his computer into my oversized blender. He must've thought I was awfully spoiled, not making my computer smoothies by hand. I really had an uphill battle ahead of me if I wanted to gain anyone's respect.

A couple of days in I got the courage to pitch a show idea to the head of development. It was a parody of "Friends" called "Friends." He looked at me like I was an idiot. "You just handed me a bunch of "Friends" scripts. I think I know now why the printer's out of ink. Look, why don't you hold off for a bit before you make any more pitches." Apparently my scripts had gone right over his head. And "Friends" was a pretty accessible show. The guy I shared my cubicle was a rube, our head of development was dense as a neutron star, and my boss was an incorrigible prankster. My situation was less than ideal to say the least.

Halfway through the summer things had only gotten worse. I was miserable. My only friend was the janitor, and he was a Roomba! I'd cry myself to sleep every night, and when I wasn't feeling that sad I would get my butler to cry me to sleep. My job was a major disappointment. It wasn't at all like that show "The Office." We had TWO guys named Dwight, and the prettiest girl wasn't dating the most handsome guy (me), but instead this guy Jim who's so inexperienced with women that when I asked him to share some girlie stories he just laughed.

All I could do was trudge along until my five weeks were up, filing away papers wherever I could cram them (I may not get the job done pretty, but I'm damn fast). And just when I had given up on ever gaining a single ounce of respect from any My Damn Channel employee, a stroke of luck bolted me right in the face.

I'll always remember it like it was yesterday, even though it was only yesterday today. Jim's girlfriend (I think her name was Xamela) told him he needed to go somewhere to sign some forms. She couldn't give him a ride because she was busy. He asked if anyone else could take him, and I shot out of my chair like I was sitting on a lit match (which for the one of the first times I wasn't). Jim didn't see me at first; his eyes scanned the room for someone to drive him but everyone pretended to be hard at work because they were too lazy to take him. Finally he saw me and said "Fine let's go Josh." And fine it was. Everyone looked up at Jim and smiled at him. Their smiles seemed to say, "I'm really happy for you that you get to go on a fun/crazy/cool ride with Josh." But the smiles had a little menace behind them that signified jealousy.

When I got back my boss laughed with mirth, patted me on the back, and said, "Good job sonny." All I ever wanted was for my boss to think of me as a son, but life isn't easy. I had to put in my time to get what I wanted — let's just say I don't think I could've earned the luxury of being treated by my boss like his own flesh and blood if I hadn't given Jim that ride. And now, in these last couple of months before my summer ends and I have to go back to hitting the books trying to eventually earn my GED, I can look back at my time at My Damn Channel atop my pool float, computer smoothie in hand, and know that that one lesson I learned was well worth all my trifles. Plus it helped that I was making more than the rest of the office combined.


Thanks, Josh, er, Sonny! We will miss you! We know it will be tough going back to Stanford to get a world-class education, but it's better you than us!

We fully intend to continue stalking following you and your writing as @artsypriest and as a writer for The Stanford Chaparral.

PS: If any of you, dear readers, for some strange, maddening reason, would like to be an intern for My Damn Channel, please send an email to info@MyDamnChannel.com, and be sure to include links to your blog, Twitter and Tumblr accounts, or any other writing samples you might have! In the immortal words of the Jersey Shore kids in Italy, "Arrivederci, summer!"

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Intern Appreciation Day!

Posted in Interns, Maria, My Damn Channel with tags My Damn Channel HQ, interns, internships, Adam Zeelens, Katie Needle, empty nest syndrome on 8/12/2011 12:45:29 PM by Maria

It happens all the time. The birds leave the nest. The cubs leave the cave. The horses leave the stable. Who knows if all of those euphemisms are correct? We're just happy we know what the word "euphemism" means.

But today's the end of summer internships for a couple of the good ones: Adam and Katie.

Adam helped us write pithy one-liners and articles for a blog that we might never be able to share with you at the rate we're going.

Katie dutifully sent t-shirts and pens to about five people over the summer, just like we asked her to.

We're not sure if they learned anything useful during their time with us, but we're pretty happy to share burritos and taco salads with them on their last day.  Nothing quite says, "thank you," like the gift of Mexican cuisine.

So here's to you, sweet summer interns! May your returns to your respective schools and future ventures be as awesome as this past summer, but with a lot less heatpocalypse type stuff.

Maybe our very own Dan Wilburn-- himself a former Professional My Damn Channel Intern-- said it best in his tribute to them on Twitter:

But they were also the BEST kind of mediocre. (And actually, they were awesome all the way through.  Not mediocre. Take it back, Dan Wilburn, take it back.)

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A Win Win Situation

Posted in Book of Mormon, Gigi with tags Book of Mormon, Sweepstakes, Winners, Josh Gad, Sharon Cruz-Nichols on 6/27/2011 8:07:03 AM by Dubs

Check out our "The Book of Mormon" sweepstakes winner Sharon Cruz-Nichols and her husband, James, with Josh Gad after the show! Here's to our guests - we hope you had a blast in NYC.

Check out Josh in Season 1 of Gigi: Almost American here.

Enter our current sweepstakes here.

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Mark Malkoff is More Popular Than Ever

Posted in Maria, Mark Malkoff with tags Mark Malkoff, internet addiction, technology addiction, comedian, comedy, prank, stunt, NYC, Daily Show on 9/17/2010 12:23:04 PM by Maria

So, to recap: Mark Malkoff spent 5 Days In The Bathroom to try to rid himself of his internet addiction.  This makes the internet love him more.  Behold:


















Even former former Conan and Daily Show writer Rob Kutner got in on it:



So, now we know: YOU CANNOT QUIT THE MEDIA.  THE MEDIA WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND FIND YOU WHEREVER YOU ARE EVEN IF YOU ARE IN YOUR OWN BATHROOM IN QUEENS.  And Rob Kutner, can you try to be less funny and witty when writing tweets about our videos, please?  You are making some of us look bad. 

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Checking In On Mark Malkoff

Posted in Maria, Mark Malkoff with tags internet addiction, internet addiction disorder, technology addiction, technology overload, Mark Malkoff, NYC, New York, comedy, stunt, prank on 8/26/2010 3:30:30 AM by Maria

We told you that Mark Malkoff has decided to cure his technology addiction by staying in his bathroom for five days. 

So how's he doing?

Well, Mark's wife, Christine, is manning his twitter account during the detox:



Mark has figured out how to turn his medicine cabinet into a pantry:



And Mark got a housebathroomguest when local New York NBC affiliate, WNBC via LXTV, visited to see exactly how a man spends five days in his own bathroom.

The answer?  Not very comfortably.

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My Damn Channel at NYU: 3/11/10

Posted in Streamy Awards with tags IAWTV, My Damn Channel, Rob Barnett, Streamy Awards, NYU on 3/9/2010 12:35:30 PM by Virginia Reiff

Thursday night, March 11, our My Damn Channel Founder/CEO & Handsome Man, Rob Barnett, will answer your probing questions personally at NYU's Cantor Film Center - following the International Academy of Web Television's Streamy Awards finalist's screening.  

Come see original videos nominated as the best in the biz and learn more about this whole web tv thang.

(free) tickets here 

NYU Cantor Film Center
36 East 8th Street
NY, NY
6 pm - 9:30 pm 

The night will be moderated by Jamison Tilsner from Tubefilter.tv

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GraceNMichelle: 2 Girls 1 CUPid

Posted in Daily Grace, My Damn Channel with tags GraceNMichelle, Grace Helbig, Michelle Vargas, smokybanjo, 2 Girls 1 CUPid, Valentine's Day, The People's Improv Theater on 2/16/2010 8:00:01 AM by KT Pierce ~ Voodoo Priestess

On Valentine's Day, a bunch of folks from the My Damn Channel family went on a special date with our favorite gal pals, GraceNMichelle.

Pictured above left: (L-R) Kevin Flynn ("Puca"), Joshua Nicholson ("MRJOTZ"), Anthony Willingham ("Calvin Bentington"), KT Pierce ("Harvey Potato"/"ktgilead"), and James Dunne ("smokybanjo").

All other pictures: Grace Helbig (from My Damn Channel's Daily Grace) and Michelle Vargas nerding it up at The People's Imrpov Theater during their Valentine's Day comedy sketch show: 2 Girls 1 CUPid.

Not pictured, our twitter/facebook lady, Armeni Kamciyan, also came down to watch the girls shake their booties and put on a performance to steal (and eventually melt) all of our evil/cold hearts.

Just in case you missed the news, Puca and Smokybanjo flew all the way from Ireland to meet everyone and they had no idea what they were in for at Sunday night's show. 

They sat in their seats, innocently watching while the girls paraded around on stage drooling over their fictitious love interests, "Ross and Ryan" - who, consequently, ended up being the lucky Puca & Smokybanjo. They didn't even have to worry about memorizing any lines to play the part - they were handed tiny pieces of paper (shaped like little red hearts).  It went something like this:

Grace:     Do you love us?

Ross & Ryan:     No.

Michelle:    Why don't you love us?

Ross & Ryan:    Because we love each other!

(The crowd roars with laughter)

That was a tough one to make the boys say out loud...

Keep up with GraceNMichelle, and maybe you'll bump into one of us at their next show...

gracenmichelle.tumblr.com

twitter.com/gracenmichelle

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